11 months and 8 days down, 22 more to go!!

Some days I feel like I will never look into the eyes of the man I love again. And other days, I can see myself with him for the first time in two years. It has been the most interesting experience having a missionary out. People have asked me "how do you know it will work out?" And my answer to them is that I don't know 100%, but there is a feeling I get when I read his letters, pray about him, or think about him in general. I can't put in words the feeling of absolute surety that I love him. Am I scared out of my mind that he might not feel the same way? Yes!! But isn't that how it always is until you can actually talk to the one you love? I haven't been in love with anyone else and that is one reason I know he is the one. I have dated so many guys in the last two years, and with each guy I feel guilty. Guilty because I am leading him on in a way and because I am always thinking of another guy. Elder Harris stole my heart sometime during the two years before his mission. And it feels like half of me left on the plane with him. I can't be completely with another guy because my heart belongs to someone that is on the other side of the world. I'm not sure if Elder Harris fully realizes how completely I belong to him. I guess I'll find out in 22 days!

30 more... and life keeps coming.

Well, for anyone that didn't know, I am now 21. It really isn't that big of a deal except for the fact that I had to renew my license. I was so glad to be able to put a new picture on that little card. (My old one made me look like a druggie!) This birthday was a really good one. I basically celebrated all weekend. It started on Friday by me going to the BYU men's volleyball game with V. It was a fun game (BYU won, which can be good or bad depending on who you are) and afterwards was hilarious! Saturday was filled with volleyball. I helped my dad coach my sister's team! Sunday was my actually birthday. I had a relaxing day and enjoyed my birthday dinner. My friend Chad came over and ate with us and then stayed to watch "Shark Tale". I had a lot of fun! Then since Monday was Martin Luther King, Jr.'s day we didn't have school. I was able to go to see "Sherlock Holmes" with V, Chad, and a few other friends. It was a Great movie! I recommend it!!!!

Today, Elder Harris has exactly 30 more days until he is back in Utah. I can't begin to tell you how amazing that is to know. In the last week I have had so many wonderful feelings from the Spirit!! I was kind of expecting this last month to fly by, but it is SO slow!!! I think it would have been easier if I hadn't found out his arrival day. Oh well. :) I just need to find things that will keep me extra busy!!

Thanks for all those that wished my a happy birthday. I love you all!

Happy Birthday!!!

Well I know it is a little late but my sister's birthday was on Tuesday. She is no longer a teenager!! Now she is the big 2 0. That is right we are the same age right now!! I love my sister so much and our relationship has been growing!! Love it!!!

Love you TONS and BUNCHES, Sister!!!!

40 Days

When I woke up this morning, one of the first things I thought about was 40 days. That is right, I know that Elder Harris will be back on February 19th. Only 40 more days!!!! But then on the way to school I thought about it some more. I was starving because I didn't eat breakfast (I thought I was going to be late). That took my thoughts to how the Lord fasted for 40 days and 40 nights. I am in awe!!!! The Lord is truly amazing! I can barely make it through one day. When I put it in the context of no food, 40 days seems like a really really long time! Luck for me I am only fasting from being with the man I love (which is just as hard I think!) and after 23 months I can make it another 40 days!! I am so so excited!!! And probably every other feeling in the spectrum! It will be a good/crazy month in February!!

Deep Breath

Wow!! The first week back to school has just ended and I already don't get enough sleep or prioritize well enough. This week has been filled with homework and volleyball. The problem is I weigh playing volleyball on one side and then homework on the other. Which one wins? That's right, volleyball. Hands down!! I told myself on Wednesday after a few hours of volleyball that I would not put off my homework for after volleyball any more. But then... My dad's little 12 year old team (who are so good and so cute) had practice at 6 last night. I went out to help my dad and ended up running it all by myself because my dad went to play church ball. It was so fun! And then one of my girls, Morgan, came to train with my dad. (She's training because all of my girls ended up playing for different teams this year :( and none at Bouncers') Well I ended up staying and helping with the training session! It was fun! And then another girl that is currently on my dad's 16 year old team arrived. I had fun helping her too. Unfortunately that made me stay out in the gym even longer! So I put off homework again. My bad! I don't think I'm doing very well with the homework thing! This next week will get better! I have things figured out and I'm going to do my very best in my classes! That is all we can really do right?! :) Don't procrastinate!! Life really stinks later!!

New Years

Have you ever let something bad build up inside of you for a day, month, or even years? Something like resentment from things you can't control? Well if you have then you know how I feel. But I have decided to put a stop to that ASAP! :) This year my resolution is to be completely free of any and all resentment or hard feelings in general towards anyone. I know that I will get annoyed and mad but I won't let it build up inside. I need to be happier and I think that this will really help. Plus, having hard feelings doesn't' hurt the other person very much at all. It mostly just hurts me, a lot! So why put myself through that, right?! So I'm off to find a way that will help me to let things roll off my back. Wish me luck haha!!!